{"id":3155,"date":"2022-05-25T18:48:17","date_gmt":"2022-05-25T18:48:17","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/planetspaceball.com\/?p=3155"},"modified":"2022-05-25T20:27:32","modified_gmt":"2022-05-25T20:27:32","slug":"movies-from-the-garage-major-league","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/planetspaceball.com\/?p=3155","title":{"rendered":"Movies From the Garage &#8211; Major League"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>Oh how I love Major League and sports movies of the 80s variety. Summing up our plot, a rich widow inherits the shit Cleveland Indians but can&#8217;t sell the team and move it to Miami (because who wants to live in Cleveland&#8230;) unless game attendance is a record setting low.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"tenor-gif-embed\" data-postid=\"20158246\" data-share-method=\"host\" data-aspect-ratio=\"1.77778\" data-width=\"100%\"><a href=\"https:\/\/tenor.com\/view\/you-guys-stink-motivation-gif-20158246\">You Guys Stink Motivation GIF<\/a>from <a href=\"https:\/\/tenor.com\/search\/you+guys+stink-gifs\">You Guys Stink GIFs<\/a><\/div> <script type=\"text\/javascript\" async=\"\" src=\"https:\/\/tenor.com\/embed.js\"><\/script>\n\n\n\n<p><br>Easy enough, just fire everyone and bring in a catcher, Jake Taylor (Tom Berenger), who has blown knees, Third Base Roger Dorn, (Corbin Bernsen) who is too precious to get in front of the ball, and pitcher Ricky Vaughn, (Charlie Sheen), just paroled. Let&#8217;s not forget Pedro Cerrano (Dennis Haysbert), can&#8217;t hit a curve ball, and Willie Mays Hays (Wesley Snipes), can&#8217;t hit anything.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"tenor-gif-embed\" data-postid=\"12476415\" data-share-method=\"host\" data-aspect-ratio=\"1.744\" data-width=\"100%\"><a href=\"https:\/\/tenor.com\/view\/major-league-shitty-salty-gif-12476415\">Major League GIF<\/a>from <a href=\"https:\/\/tenor.com\/search\/major-gifs\">Major GIFs<\/a><\/div> <script type=\"text\/javascript\" async=\"\" src=\"https:\/\/tenor.com\/embed.js\"><\/script>\n\n\n\n<p><br>As these things always go, the team starts off the year in the toilet. But gradually the players overcome their individual shortcomings and become a team that can compete and win in the end. This is not why we are here. We are here for subplot Jake and Lynn. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>I remember having the most inappropriate crush on the Jake character. And why? There&#8217;s certainly nothing to see here in an old, overweight, white guy with bad knees who wears readers. I would not be dissuaded. Preteen me thought that the romance with his ex-wife was just dreamy. In reality, what we have here is a way past his prime Jake stalking his seemingly happy ex wife until she, far to willingly in my opinion, sleeps with him. Now Lynn the accomplished and smoking hot librarian has to decide whether she wants to dump her fiance for Jake. Let me tell you, THIS PLOT DID NOT AGE WELL.<\/p>\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-image\">\n<figure class=\"aligncenter size-full\"><img data-recalc-dims=\"1\" loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"474\" height=\"474\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/planetspaceball.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/05\/mlmd.webp?resize=474%2C474&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-3186\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/planetspaceball.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/05\/mlmd.webp?w=592&amp;ssl=1 592w, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/planetspaceball.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/05\/mlmd.webp?resize=150%2C150&amp;ssl=1 150w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 474px) 100vw, 474px\" \/><figcaption>This guy? Really Lynn?<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n\n\n<p><br>Like, girl. What are you doing? This banker (?) who obviously has a nice midtown apartment, a 401k, and can take you to brunch whenever you want is the way. Not the guy who will get with other women on a dare and is going to bounce out of the pros on a medical at the end of the season, and yes I&#8217;m calling stalker. STALKER. But yes even I was smitten before I easily learned to do better than that trash. Ew. Never would I ever. \ud83e\udd23<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Favorite Character: Pedro Cerrano, one hundred percent.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"tenor-gif-embed\" data-postid=\"13886846\" data-share-method=\"host\" data-aspect-ratio=\"1.8018\" data-width=\"100%\"><a href=\"https:\/\/tenor.com\/view\/bats-major-league-ritual-gif-13886846\">Bats Major League GIF<\/a>from <a href=\"https:\/\/tenor.com\/search\/bats-gifs\">Bats GIFs<\/a><\/div> <script type=\"text\/javascript\" async=\"\" src=\"https:\/\/tenor.com\/embed.js\"><\/script>\n\n\n\n<p><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>RATING: \u26be\u26be\u26be\u26be\u26be<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Oh how I love Major League and sports movies of the 80s variety. Summing up our plot, a rich widow inherits the shit Cleveland Indians but can&#8217;t sell the team and move it to Miami (because who wants to live in Cleveland&#8230;) unless game attendance is a record setting low. You Guys Stink Motivation GIFfrom &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/planetspaceball.com\/?p=3155\" class=\"more-link\">Continue reading <span class=\"screen-reader-text\">Movies From the Garage &#8211; Major League<\/span> <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":3157,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"csbAdvScrollBarCursor":"","_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[133],"tags":[160,138,161],"class_list":["post-3155","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-movies-from-the-garage-theatre","tag-major-league","tag-movies-from-the-garage","tag-never-get-back-with-your-ex"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/planetspaceball.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/04\/ml.jpg?fit=1200%2C600&ssl=1","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":3633,"url":"https:\/\/planetspaceball.com\/?p=3633","url_meta":{"origin":3155,"position":0},"title":"Movies From My Couch Because The Garage Theater is Too Hot &#8211; Soldier","author":"sb1","date":"July 18, 2024","format":false,"excerpt":"No big deal, I finally picked a winner to rent. How have I not seen or heard of this before?! Soldier is like a Halo movie that pulls in references and easter eggs from, oh, I don't know, a dozen different movies and cartoons? Let's just go ahead and assume\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Movies From The Garage&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Movies From The Garage","link":"https:\/\/planetspaceball.com\/?cat=133"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/planetspaceball.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/07\/awards.webp?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/planetspaceball.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/07\/awards.webp?resize=350%2C200&ssl=1 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/planetspaceball.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/07\/awards.webp?resize=525%2C300&ssl=1 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/planetspaceball.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/07\/awards.webp?resize=700%2C400&ssl=1 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/planetspaceball.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/07\/awards.webp?resize=1050%2C600&ssl=1 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":2735,"url":"https:\/\/planetspaceball.com\/?p=2735","url_meta":{"origin":3155,"position":1},"title":"Movies From The Garage &#8211; Paranormal Activity: Next of Kin","author":"sb1","date":"March 23, 2022","format":false,"excerpt":"We aren't actually reporting from the garage for the foreseeable future because it is mostly ice, rain, or cold outside. And we only have one slanket. While my partner in crime was away for work I took the opportunity to watch Paranormal Activity: Next of Kin. There are some things\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Movies From The Garage&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Movies From The Garage","link":"https:\/\/planetspaceball.com\/?cat=133"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/planetspaceball.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/01\/panok.jpg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/planetspaceball.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/01\/panok.jpg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/planetspaceball.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/01\/panok.jpg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/planetspaceball.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/01\/panok.jpg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/planetspaceball.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/01\/panok.jpg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":2174,"url":"https:\/\/planetspaceball.com\/?p=2174","url_meta":{"origin":3155,"position":2},"title":"Movies From The Garage &#8211; Dragonslayer","author":"sb1","date":"October 22, 2021","format":false,"excerpt":"Movies from the 1980s can be especially tough to revisit. You're sitting there watching this flaming pile of cocaine induced fever dreams and thinking to yourself, \"I remember thinking that this was the greatest movie ever made when I was 5 years old (back in the old days, parental guidance,\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Movies From The Garage&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Movies From The Garage","link":"https:\/\/planetspaceball.com\/?cat=133"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/planetspaceball.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/dragonslayer.webp?fit=1200%2C890&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/planetspaceball.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/dragonslayer.webp?fit=1200%2C890&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/planetspaceball.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/dragonslayer.webp?fit=1200%2C890&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/planetspaceball.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/dragonslayer.webp?fit=1200%2C890&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/planetspaceball.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/dragonslayer.webp?fit=1200%2C890&ssl=1&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":1948,"url":"https:\/\/planetspaceball.com\/?p=1948","url_meta":{"origin":3155,"position":3},"title":"Movies From The Garage &#8211; Robin Hood Prince Of Thieves","author":"sb1","date":"October 4, 2021","format":false,"excerpt":"Welcome to Shitty Movies From the Garage! This is what we do now, in fancy Heywood Wakefield movie seats. Never miss a day of antiquing, ya'll. I only have approximately three things that I get to experience now, so thanks, Pandemic!We did a rewatch of the absolute banger of a\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Movies From The Garage&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Movies From The Garage","link":"https:\/\/planetspaceball.com\/?cat=133"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/planetspaceball.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/pot.jpg?fit=839%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/planetspaceball.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/pot.jpg?fit=839%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/planetspaceball.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/pot.jpg?fit=839%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/planetspaceball.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/pot.jpg?fit=839%2C1200&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":2081,"url":"https:\/\/planetspaceball.com\/?p=2081","url_meta":{"origin":3155,"position":4},"title":"Movies From The Garage &#8211; Excalibur","author":"sb1","date":"October 12, 2021","format":false,"excerpt":"Continuing from where we left off in this new series, \"(Shit) Movies From The Garage,\" we watched Excalibur. I know for a fact that I have not seen this in its entirety since near to when it came out in 1981 when I was four years old. But rest assured,\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Movies From The Garage&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Movies From The Garage","link":"https:\/\/planetspaceball.com\/?cat=133"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/planetspaceball.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/img_0391-2-scaled.jpg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/planetspaceball.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/img_0391-2-scaled.jpg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/planetspaceball.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/img_0391-2-scaled.jpg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/planetspaceball.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/img_0391-2-scaled.jpg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/planetspaceball.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/10\/img_0391-2-scaled.jpg?fit=1200%2C900&ssl=1&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]},{"id":2476,"url":"https:\/\/planetspaceball.com\/?p=2476","url_meta":{"origin":3155,"position":5},"title":"Movies From The Garage &#8211; Reign Of Fire","author":"sb1","date":"November 6, 2021","format":false,"excerpt":"Reign of Fire. Where to begin?! Is this the best post apocalyptic hellscape dragon vs man survival movie ever made? Short answer: yes. I'm told that when I exited the theater after making my smokeshow of a boyfriend take me to this movie on opening day in 2002, I loudly\u2026","rel":"","context":"In &quot;Movies From The Garage&quot;","block_context":{"text":"Movies From The Garage","link":"https:\/\/planetspaceball.com\/?cat=133"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/planetspaceball.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/11\/rof.jpg?fit=1200%2C675&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/planetspaceball.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/11\/rof.jpg?fit=1200%2C675&ssl=1&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/planetspaceball.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/11\/rof.jpg?fit=1200%2C675&ssl=1&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/planetspaceball.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/11\/rof.jpg?fit=1200%2C675&ssl=1&resize=700%2C400 2x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/planetspaceball.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/11\/rof.jpg?fit=1200%2C675&ssl=1&resize=1050%2C600 3x"},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/planetspaceball.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3155","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/planetspaceball.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/planetspaceball.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/planetspaceball.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/planetspaceball.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=3155"}],"version-history":[{"count":12,"href":"https:\/\/planetspaceball.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3155\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3195,"href":"https:\/\/planetspaceball.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3155\/revisions\/3195"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/planetspaceball.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/3157"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/planetspaceball.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=3155"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/planetspaceball.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=3155"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/planetspaceball.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=3155"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}